I prepare for the noble war.

424,677 notes

sluttyoliveoil:

once my friend was waiting for her mom to pick her up and she called her mom and her mom said “im on my way, the traffic is just slow, im coming” and my friend went “mom i called the house phone”

(via bullied)

161,787 notes

manateeluver64:

my 3 year old brother regularly paints his nails (rn they’re sparkly pink) and shows them off at preschool and all of his friends are so jealous bc their mom won’t let them paint their nails because they’re boys.

(via cartel)

537,019 notes

xcarolynnn:

cloudydayrealestate:

the satisfaction

One time in like 5th grade I had this teacher and she gave us all bottles of shit like this and told us to squeeze it all out and of course we were like fuck yeah and did it and then she said, “Now, try and shove it all back in the container.” Of course we all tried, and then stared at her confused as shit. When we all obviously gave up, she said, “In the moment, you were so consumed with what you were doing that you didn’t realize the mess you were making. Then, after it was so quickly and easily poured out, you realize it is impossible to put it all back in. Remember this for the rest of your lives when it comes to the words that come out of your mouth” and we were like 10 so we were like yeah ok whatever lady, but somehow to this day I think of it constantly. 

(Source: officialkirstie, via mypartywithmoriarty)